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February 27, 2003

Armageddon it

It's the end of the world as we know it And I feel fine. --REM
Some say the end is near Some say we'll see Armageddon soon. I certainly hope we will; I sure could use a vacation from this bullshit three-ring circus sideshow. --Tool

Is the world ending soon? Is the Second Coming around the corner? A lot of my fellow Christians seem to think so. Why is it so important to so many people to believe that we are living in the End Times? Read on for a few of my comments on the topic.

That "prophecy" is a dominant topic within American evangelical circles today is no secret; a simple trip to the "Christian" section at your local Barnes and Noble will treat you to the site of countless shelves of books by self-professed prophecy experts attempting to provide easily-digestible answers to questions about Armageddon and the Antichrist. At my job, I have encountered hundreds of Christian websites devoted to the topic of prophecy and the idea that the world will end within our generation.

Theologically, I am not a dispensationalist; but I understand that many of my fellow Christians are. I have no problem with their belief that we are living in the End Times, as it is in fact a fundamental part of their cosmology. However, I have begun to wonder if the belief in an imminent apocalypse hasn't spread beyond the borders of the rather specific doctrines of dispensationalism into other branches of Christianity. In a recent conversation with a Christian Reformed acquaintance, I was surprised to hear my friend--an amillenialist who doesn't interpret Revelation as a literal picture of 20th century history--point out to me as if it were obvious that we were living in the End Times.

Are we living in the End Times? Is the end of the world right around the corner? I suppose it's possible (I mean, who really knows?), but I don't there's much special evidence for believing that we're near the End. For thousands of years, people have believed that their generation was the last, that events in their lifetimes matched perfectly with the apocalyptic visions of Revelation, that the prevalence of evil and godlessness had grown so great that the Lord's return must be imminent. Today, many Christians seem to share this same general feeling: that the world has never been more evil and that we are at the edge of the Apocalypse.

I genuinely don't understand this. If the destruction of Rome, or the fall of Constantinople, or the Black Plague, or the French Revolution, or the Holocaust, or hundreds of other epic disasters didn't signal the end of the world, can people really believe that the World Trade Center attack (a tragedy to be sure, but pretty minor in the grand scheme of history) is irrefutably a sign of the oncoming End? Are people unaware that hundreds of generations before them have used the same words, the same Bible verses, to predict that the End would come in their lifetime? Is there a subtle psychological benefit that we derive from a belief that the world will end soon? Why are people so interested in this? And beyond simple interest, why does it seem that the idea of an impending End is permanently implanted in the hearts and minds of so many believers?

It's not too hard to see where this belief in imminent apocalypse has its origins. Numerous parables (see Matthew 25 for at least two examples) warn us that the End will be both unexpected and terrifying for those caught unprepared. Furthermore, Jesus himself predicts an imminent End within the first generation of the early Christian church. But the fact that these parables and statements, with their strong implication that the world will end in the very near future, obviously did not come true within the lifetimes of their original audiences, implies to me that such statements are not referring to the end of the world in the way that most people want them to. If these were references to the specific end of the world, they would have been meaningless and misleading to the original intended audience, and in the case of Jesus' statement, an outright false prophecy--a possibility I don't accept. But if these passages are rather intended to communicate a general encouragement to believers to serve God wholeheartedly at all times (because we never know when, say, death might claim us), why are people trying to use these sorts of passages to pinpoint when the End will come? Since such comments weren't literally true for Jesus' audience, doesn't it make sense to look for an alternate interpretation that a) would have had relevance to early Christians and b) doesn't require that they be referring to the end of the world, which didn't happen? Or should we arbitrarily assume that these comments were literal, but stated purely for the benefit of 21st century Christians living in the real End Times? How many more generations of Apocalypse-guessing will we have to endure before somebody finally realizes that the Bible just doesn't tell us when the world will end?

If you were reading this entry hoping for answers, I'm sorry to disappoint you. This is simply a phenomenon that I don't understand. I don't believe the world is about to end--not because it's impossible that the Lord might return tomorrow, but because I see no real evidence for it beyond our apparent human psychological need to believe that we are living at the crux of history, that our generation is the pivotal one upon which the salvation of the doomed world depends. What do you think? Do you believe the world will end soon? Why? My enquiring mind wants to know.

February 17, 2003

You could have it all

As I write this, the hypnotic warbling of Johnny Cash's voice is filling the room... singing a cover of Nine Inch Nail's "Hurt." Johnny Cash, I love you.

February 16, 2003

Return of the native

Yes, faithful blog-readers, I have returned. I have emerged from torpor, shaken off the slumber of long-forgotten aeons, and am once again posting. The last week has seen some truly great blog posts by my fellow bloggers, most especially Alan and pcg. Great stuff, guys. However, if you are somehow expecting that I've spent the last week of blogging inactivity brainstorming up incredibly brilliant topics to post, you are in for a disappointment. That's right--until I re-acquaint myself with this whole blogging thing, you will have to suffer through yet another "here's what I did this weekend" type post. Without further ado, then, here is what I did this weekend:

  • spent the Best. Valentine's Day. Evar. with the amazing Michele. Have I mentioned lately that Michele is amazing? We celebrated Valentine's Day on Saturday, a day later than everyone else--we went out to an Italian restaurant in Muskegon and chatted about everything from the impact of World War 2 on Sartre's philosophy, to the horrific-ness of that old sitcom Married with Children, to the subtleties of the ancient Egyptian distinction between cosmic order and chaos. Have I mentioned that Michele is amazing? She's amazing. We're getting married, you know.
  • I watched Memento (thanks to Mark for recommending it). An excellent film, and it's put me in the mood to watch The Usual Suspects again. I was halfway expecting the main character from Memento to reveal at the end of the film that he was, in fact, Kaiser Soze. Anyway, most of you have probably seen Memento already, but if you haven't, you should immediately bump it to the top of your rental list.
  • I read up on Vernor Vinge's theory that by the year 2035, computers will have acquired godlike sentience and will have achieved dominance over humanity, ushering in a new glorious age of machines. If you haven't read anything by Vinge, you owe it to yourself to check him out--he's an absolutely brilliant sci-fi writer. He is quite serious about his machines-will-take-over theory and in fact focuses heavily on that theme in his novels. I very highly recommend A Fire Upon the Deep and A Deepness in the Sky, two of the best sci-fi novels I've read since Frank Herbert's work. Fire is a look at a far-future universe in which computers have evolved into godlike entities, far beyond the pale of human understanding; Deepness is a novel set in a universe in which machines cannot achieve sentience, and so humanity is supported by hopelessly complex, nearly incomprehensible levels of automation. As for the whole machines-taking-over thing, I'll confess I'm kind of looking forward to it. Perhaps I'll delve into that in a later post, or perhaps I'll save it for my therapist. (Thanks once again to Mark for sending the Vinge link.)

So yes, that was my weekend. I hope you all had wonderfully romantic Valentine's Days. Or if you didn't, I hope you spent it doing something fun like playing computer games all weekend. Or perhaps some combination of both. Have a great Monday!

February 14, 2003

It's Friday, I'm in love

I'm all out of witty comments today. It's Friday and all that.

February 6, 2003

Life in the Windy City

So I'm gearing up for another trip to Chicago this weekend. I loathe Chicago for many reasons, one of which is that it has leeched hundreds of dollars out of me in the form of incredibly lame parking tickets. Every so often, the streetsweeper would come by to clean the streets of Hyde Park and restore it to its prestine natural appearance. Allegedly, they give people ample notice to move their cars away from the street-cleaning area before they actually clean it. In reality, I would frequently emerge from my apartment in the morning to see a row of 30 parked cars (including, of course, mine) with $50 tickets on the windshields. That's right--instead of seeing the row of 30 cars and wondering if maybe, just possibly, there might be something wrong with their method of giving people advance notice about the street cleaning (the usual method is to tape a torn piece of paper to a tree somewhere within a 5 mile radius of the street cleaning area), they decide that the only thing that can be done is to issue tickets to all the lawbreakers who are flagrantly flaunting the wheels of justice. I can only hope that the city aldersmen (requirement for being a Chicago aldersman: at least 2 felony convictions) enjoyed the drugs they purchased with my parking ticket money.

And that's not even taking into account the money they make off of freeway tolls. As far as I can tell, only about 1.5 miles of the 90 expressway is actually within the borders of Illinois, but that doesn't stop them from charging $2 to enjoy driving along that stretch of gray, industrial wasteland. My first encounter with the Chicago toll system went like this:

Andy: (squinting to see the toll booth sign through the rain) By all that is holy, I think that sign said that the toll was two dollars. Having driven all over the country and never encountered a toll booth that charged even 25% of that, I can't believe that's right. Well, I'll get out two dollars just in case but I'll ask to make sure that's the right amount.

(stops at toll booth)

Andy: Hi, how much is the toll?

Toll Booth Guy: (glares contemptuously) Two bucks.

Andy: OK, here you go. (hands over two dollar bills)

Toll Booth Guy: (stares angrily, long pause) Hey, if you already had the two bucks, why didn't you just give it to me? How come you asked how much the toll was?

Andy: (awkward pause) Uh, because I wasn't sure how much the toll was.

Toll Booth Guy: (with a disdainful sneer) Yeah, right. (pauses for a few more awkward seconds, then opens the toll gate)

Andy: (drives through)

I'm usually not this vitriolic on Thursday nights. But I got to thinking about Chicago, and... well, that's just never a fun thing.

Now I'm off to finish preparing for tomorrow's D&D session.

February 3, 2003

Holy matrimony and all that

Those of you waiting with baited breath for more details on the upcoming merger of the Rau and Voeltz dynasties, your patience has paid off: Michele and I have created a website for the purpose of imparting info about our wedding. We are still in the process of filling it with content, and so if you have any comments about how we can make it as useful as possible, please let us know. The especially observant amongst you will note marked similarities between the design of the wedding site and the designs of my and Michele's blogs. Pretty mysterious, eh?

Oh, and all sorts of people have been posting insightful comments on my Donnie Darko post from a while back. If you have thoughts on the film, you really ought to go post them there.

This weekend was OK. Worse than some, better than most. Good things about it included: an apartment search in GR that turned up some promising prospects, an RPG session, and a LAN party involving several matches of an oldie-but-goodie, Total Annihilation. Bad things: no visit with Michele, not going to church on Sunday, and getting sick. So I suppose it was about average as far as weekends in Muskegon go. Aren't you glad you asked?